Strengthen yourself in the LORD!
It has been some time since I have written or posted here, in fact at times I get frustrated at the lack of comments or responses to the thoughts surrounding PTSD, or things posted. I know many people read through, scan, or just glimpse at some of these things, so that is encouraging. If I have to be completely upfront, I shouldn’t be frustrated, I don’t write things for me, well- not completely, I write out of obedience to God, and love for you all.
Let me offer this thought - I struggle, I struggle deeply at times with all sorts of things in my head that the enemy tries - to derail me with. The enemy is crafty and cunning, and at times (more than I care to admit or offer to you the reader at this moment) he succeeds in derailing me. It should not be that easy for the enemy to throw me or you off right? Yet time, and time, and time again that same old enemy, and hater of our souls comes at us in the same manner with the same lies, and the same tactics and does a spiritual leg sweep that takes us down hard - wondering what happened, how we didn’t see “that” coming again, and so-forth.
Do you know what I mean? I think you do. We all struggle in our heads. Let me encourage you. The Lord is ever-present in your grief, your fear, your self-imposed shame. He is present. Decide now that you will trust Him with those things, because when grief hits like ‘Iron-man’ Mike Tison in his prime, you don’t want to be found on the proverbial floor of despair and doubt - you want to be found in the strength and timing of the real presence of the living God!
In 1 Samuel 30:6 we see these words, “Now David was greatly distressed, for the people spoke of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and his daughters. But David strengthened himself in the LORD his God” (NKJV).
Can you imagine the distress David must have been experiencing? In the previous verses, we see a few things:
Ziklag was burned with fire by the Amalekites.
The Amalekites had taken the women and those with them captive (they did not kill anyone).
David and his men came back into Ziklag and found it destroyed with fire - and their wives and children were taken captive.
David and everyone with him all lifted their voices and wept until they had no more strength or power in themselves to weep (Have you ever been there?).
David’s wives were taken away captive (modern day equivalent of being kidnapped, and not knowing what would happen to those you love).
Oh, and now we get to those who were with David, those who wept with him, those who walked with David, serving him - they now were talking of stoning him to death - blaming him, and now in their deep grief and struggle with fear - they wanted to kill David.
Look I have been in places of doubt, fear, anxieties, PTSD, and so-forth - seeking a way out and sometimes blaming others for what has happened, but David responds well, with faith, with strength and integrity in the midst of a hopeless situation. He strengthens himself in His Lord!
I want to strengthen myself in the Lord my God more than I have in the past! Let me give you a couple of areas below -
God is trustworthy! David knew this, and no matter the stress or difficulties David trusted in his God! David probably was reminding himself of the might and marvel of his God, how He (God) took care of him in the past, how He protected him and fed him, and watched over him. David knew his God was unchanging, and trustworthy and true. God! I want to trust in Him more and more.
God has never failed. When the moments in our life become overwhelming, when they become unbearable and intensely painful - remember God has not failed you, not once, not ever! He will continue to walk with you in the dark valley, through the storm, through the hardships and tears. He wants to be in relationship with you as you live this life in preparation for the next - eternity with Him.
God allows such times of adversity in our lives for many reasons - here are a couple:
To draw us close to Him.
To help us to see that we cannot do things in our strength but must be strengthened in His love and timing.
He is preparing us for something.
He is showing us the big picture which we cannot see since we are finite beings and only can see our immediate pain and turmoil but hear this - God sees the entire picture from start to finish and He knows what is ahead and what His purpose is for those dark moments we all will face.
He wants to continue to refine us, shape us, move in us - He knows what is best in your life, what will move you into trust and deep faith in Him. Will you (will I) allow this painful movement to draw us nearer to the Holy God who wants relationship with us? This is not only now, but most importantly for eternity.
I could write so much more, I could tell you so many things of failures in my life, in my marriage, as a dad, as a pastor - as a human. I could, but I think you understand.
We will face hardships, adversities, trials and tribulations - but God wants us to find strength in His grace and timing. He wants to strengthen us in His love through our intrusive thoughts, through those times where we fail and fall on our faces. He is unchanging and He adores you - desiring you to be close to Him.
Will you trust this today? When they enemy comes against your weariness and those thoughts that invade - will you trust the Lord? Even when you fall, He is there to hold you, even when you weep, He catches those tears, as you learn to trust Him more and more - you will see that He is strengthening you, and is there to hold you.
Be blessed and strengthened in His love.