Learn to be Present
Learn to be present
July 29, 2021
On July 20, 2021, I wrote a post entitled Present in His Presence where I began to outline a new model for understanding PTSD. Rather than a traditional medical model of posttraumatic stress disorder, let’s look at it from a spiritual lens, and if we have to give a label to silent suffering from past events we can consider this definition:
Present Triumph Spirit Directed
Just exactly how do we learn to be present? It sounds as though it should be a normal experience for people right? Well what if I told you that you are really not being present most of the time? Let me ask you a couple of questions to see if this is you:
In conversations with friends, co-workers, family, or strangers, do you find yourself not listening, thinking about something else, contemplating what you are going to say next rather than listening to the other person?
When having everyday discussions, are you doing other things, such as texting, typing, watching television?, drawing, writing?
You can also add other things to these questions, and I am sure you have a different list of considerations for your situations. Here it is, every one of us has been distracted, and not present in many areas, and on many occasions. We don’t like to admit it, we have all believed, or perhaps still have the belief that we can do many things at once (which is true), and still be present in the moment for someone else (which is less true).
Have you ever had someone talking to you, and they asked what you thought, to which you replied (something like), “I’m sorry, I wasn’t listening, can you ask that again?” Sad right?
So? If we have a difficult time being present in those circumstances, how can we learn to be rooted, grounded, steadfast and present in the struggles from PTSD? Glad you asked. Let’s look at some areas together.
Mindfulness of who He is.
What do I mean by this? Who is God? Our understanding of God is important, if we have a poor and improper view of who He is, it will impact and influence our thought process and spiritual recognition. We must have the right understanding of our amazing Creator, even when bad things happen, and as we cultivate this awareness, we become present and begin to see more clearly through foggy things.
When we see our situation through a foggy lens, we see things within a blurry framework. I remember one night I came downstairs from the bedroom to get a glass of water, actually I was probably seeking ice cream if I am to be completely honest… As I came downstairs and began walking toward the kitchen, I looked toward the sewing room and something caught my attention, standing around 6-feet tall, the light from the moon and stars dimly shining in through the window revealed someone standing near the entryway to the kitchen area. My heart began to beat a little louder, and I thought that whoever this intruder was, they could most-likely hear it. I approached cautiously, quietly, and with intention to protect my family and house, I was in fight mode and it was time. I got closer, and then, realized the 6-foot-tall intruder was only a sewing bust/ mannequin. My wife is a seamstress along with other remarkable qualities and skills. I believe I purchased this mannequin for her so she could pin on fabric, or have a life-like object to work her craft on. My mind was clouded from sleep, and I was not truly present in the moment, my mind played the trick on me which brought me to a false understanding of what was happening, and I was not able to be present until I recognized the truth.
Is this making sense? Have you ever thought something was one-thing only to find out your recognition was blurred by circumstances, lack of sleep, shadows in the night, a strange sound in the night, past trauma still being lived as if it were happening now and in the present?
I have been awakened from night terrors about an event which happened in the past, still believing I was there. I had to train myself to learn to be present. God is an all-present God, He is with us always, He walked with us in the pain, and He seeks to provide comfort and truth in the present.
In the Gospel of John, these words are found, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free” (John 8:32). Don’t you want to be free from what you are walking in? The pain, the struggle? Jesus came to make you free from bondage. I know that He can heal, I also know He may choose not to bring healing into the physical situation, or the emotional trouble, however I also know He can do it in an instant.
Our struggle is learning to be present, to feel His presence and know His voice over the other voices of the enemy, over the voices of the trauma. He wants to be present with you, to walk you through it, to strengthen you in it. Will you allow Him in to do that very thing?
PTSD is real, yet I realized something, the intrusive thoughts and the night terrors were from the past, and I was living in the present where the past could not harm me. I recognize the changes in the Neurobiology of the brain as repeated traumatic episodes occur, yet I also hear truth in these words, “Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much “(James 5:16 [NKJV]). There may not be anything for you to confess, but through prayer, I know it avails or accomplishes much!
There is healing, there is restoration, there is power in the mighty Name of Jesus. We can walk in that assurance and in His presence.
We will look at the next area in a newer post, and continue to unpack this one throughout. Let me offer something we taught our children, which may help in some way, it is called SLURR.
This has been modified from its original definition (Stop what you are doing, Look at the person talking with you, give them your undivided attention, and respectfully respond), but the newest definition may bring help as you remember the steps. These are not meant as a cure all, actually these are suggestive in the healing journey to help ground you in the present. If they are helpful reminders to you as you struggle, or through your joys, then I am blessed. If you don’t find this acronym helpful or useful, no worries. Modify it, change it to work for you to remember simple steps to process through, or just throw this SLURR away all together.
Stop what you are doing. Stop the thought process of living in past trauma, give those thoughts to God, train your mind to understand the truth that you are in the present, not in the past.
Look at what is in front of you. Look at the here and now, the present, look to God, look to your friends, look to the truth. Cast all your anxieties on Him, for He cares for you (see 1 Peter 5:7). Look to the author and finisher of your faith (Hebrews 12:2).
Undivided attention our attention is divided from the present to the past to the future or possible future, when we need to learn how to give our undivided attention to the present and the now. I know there are therapeutic strategies that bring those thoughts back into the persons mind to help refocus the person into the present, this is good stuff. I also know we can learn how to give our undivided attention on things that are healing, things that are pure, lovely, and so-forth, and as we learn these strategies, we can focus on God. The learning is a hard journey, but you won’t be alone. God wants to help you, your friends can come alongside of you, and other things will bring hope as you begin or continue to move forward.
Relationally Respond – This is about knowing and being known by the Creator. He knows us and we are known by Him. He can help us with a relationship with Him, as we learn to respond to the past trauma, respond to the change in thought process, relate to the One who suffered and is acquainted with grief and sorrow (see Isaiah 53), and live-in relationship with Him through the process.
All of these steps are important, and perhaps you are doing some other step work through your own walk. Keep pressing ahead, you are not where you once were, you are not (perhaps) where you want to be, but you are still pressing ahead. Don’t ever give up, even when those thoughts invade, the dreams, shivers, intrusive thoughts, hypervigilance or whatever else you may experience comes back to try to haunt you, don’t ever give up! The One who created you knows you; He is with you, He may heal you, He may use the past to bring hope to the present and future.
Be mindful of who He is. This is important. We will look at Mindful of where we are (grounding work) in the next post.
Be blessed as you continue the good fight.
Kevan