AM I MORE?
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, your past trauma, your past wounds and brokenness. Is this a true statement? Yes, it really is, and yet how often do you or I believe things to the contrary? I definitely have believed lies about who I am, what I have gone through.
Even now as I type this, I recognize in myself, how I have entered into a darker portion of my life. Solomon the writer of Ecclesiastes writes something in chapter 3 for consideration:
To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to gain, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to throw away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
Later in verse 11 of the same chapter we also read how God has made everything beautiful in its time, and how he has put eternity in their hearts…except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.
Why am I typing this? I don’t know - perhaps it is because of the current state of mind I find myself in? I recognize how there is a time and season for everything under the sun, and things appointed by God Himself in our lives. So? What is the season, the time, the purpose under the sun for where I am now or where you are now? How long is this season? Some seasons feel longer than others, and the truth is, seasons have an end. What is the end of this season? Will it be when the Lord calls me home, or sooner?
I am walking in a darker headspace at the moment, is this contemplated in Ecclesiastes as a season, a time for every purpose under heaven? Does God want me or you to walk in a hard headspace? What is the reason in the season?
There is purpose from the Creator God in the seasons we walk through, except that no one can find out the work that God does from the beginning to end… what does this mean? I am not God so I cannot accurately discern His purpose - only that I can trust His purpose and intention in my life - and so can you.
Are you walking in a hard time? Trust Him in all the troubles since He cares for you. 1 Peter 5 gives us a reminder that we are to humble ourselves before God, and cast all our cares or anxieties on Him, since He cares for us (I encourage you to read it in context).
I can trust His timing, even if I don’t understand it.
I can trust His purposes, even when I don’t like the season.
I can trust His word, even if I don’t hear it.
He is faithful, I need to learn to walk in this truth, and not the voice of the enemy as He (Satan) also speaks over me, but the voice of the enemy screams lies and murder - whereas the voice of God speaks life and truth.
Listen to these passages of Scripture, and then make a choice:
John 8:32 says, “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”
John 10:10 says, “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.”
The thief is the enemy, the one who seeks to devour and to kill (Satan), and the One who has come to give life abundantly is Jesus. The enemy is a deceiver, in fact a brief search of the name Satan would show that it means, accuser, or adversary. That is what Satan is. He is prowling around like a roaring lion seeking whom He may devour (1 Peter 5:8 calls Satan / the Devil our adversary in NKJV). Satan is trying desperately to take you and I out, (not to dinner).
I cannot believe anything He says about me, since He is a liar, thief, murderer from the beginning, and His intentions are to bring me into the depths of hell. I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that He is able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day… (see 1 Timothy 1:12 and read in context)
The apostle Paul is saying to Timothy not to be ashamed of the Gospel, but to share in the sufferings alongside with him. Paul is more than convinced of the One (Jesus) whom he has believed upon and knows that Jesus is more than able to keep Paul through the present situations, the sufferings and the tribulations - until the Day Paul is called heavenward or the Lord Jesus comes back.
With all of that being said, I am still walking in dark headspace presently. What is the season or the purpose? I don’t know - other than to glorify God with my body and life. I am struggling to hear His voice but know He is trustworthy and true. I can believe that even when I can’t see clearly.
I don’t have to believe the lies of the enemy, I am more. Jesus says I am more, and so are you no matter the headspace you are currently renting out. I need to trust the Savior.
If you are walking in a dark space, seek the Lord, pray fervently, but also don’t walk alone, there is help and hope. Tell someone what is going on, someone you trust.
There is hope and help. Take a look at the ABOUT section here in this website and go to the RESOURCES section, call someone. I have also placed Talkspace below as a resource. I may not endorse all of the methods for help that are out there, but please know there are many resources to help you in your walk.