Breathe…
Genesis 2:7-9 NKJV says
“And the LORD God formed the man of the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being.”
Two blogs in a week? I must have a lot on my mind, even if this is never read by anyone, even if this website is not reaching an audience - perhaps an audience of one - me is all it needs for the brain to reprocess, refocus, and begin to repurpose to live on purpose? I don’t really know, yet today is a day for me to figure out how to breathe, how to take in deep, meaningful breaths that matter, to breathe in and re-oxygenate my lungs, my mind, my hope, my future, my purpose.
What does this look like? Am I a hypocrite for saying things, and then struggling with how to live in them? I don’t think so - a hypocrite is someone who says one thing - fully knowing they don’t buy into or subscribe to it in an attempt to fool others. This is an intentional act of defiance and manipulative or void of truth residing in the individual who proposes such hypocrisy.
I believe God is good.
I believe He wants to mold me and shape me into His image.
I believe He created me on purpose with a purpose.
I believe He is good.
I believe He desires and loves me.
Now -
I struggle in being molded and shaped… I don’t know what this looks like.
I believe He has a purpose for me, yet I struggle desperately to know it or find it.
I believe He is good; I believe this!
I believe He loves and desires me, yet I fail to live in this because of this clear and present darkness my mind has settled into.
So? Today I am trying to breathe. I am trying to breathe with such intent and focus that I am unsure how to move, unclear if I hear His voice speaking to me, or if He is silent, is He (God) in the stillness of my inner self, or is He far away?
God, you said you are near to the broken hearted, and that you save those that are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). I am troubled, God, are you close? I am broken in spirit, please come near to me. Your word offers hope, I know that I have to humble myself and draw near to You, and You will draw near to me (see James 4:7-8). I am trying.
Today I will breathe. You gave me the breath of life at birth. You breathed eternal life into me when I said, ‘yes’ to Your offer of salvation. You intentionally breathed out Your last breath on the cross and said, ‘It is finished’ (see John 19:30). Your breath for mine? I understand, I need You to give me breath of life today, Lord. I need to feel Your presence.
In the Karate Kid III with Ralph Macchio, and Pat Morita, and Thomas Ian Griffith who played Terry Silver - (the original Karate Kid is still the best one with Elizabeth Shue, whom I had such a crush on as a 12-year-old kid…) there is a line that needs to be repeated here:
If a man can’t breathe, he can’t fight (Terry Silver).
God, I feel like I am out of this fight, like the enemy is trampling and beating me down. I feel like I can’t breathe.
So? I am going to try to breathe purposefully, with intention since I know that You are good, and have breathed the very breath of life into me. Help me God.
If this message is for anyone else, who may be following, listening, reading. Please breathe alongside of me today, and as long as this season lasts. You are more, you are valued and loved, and loveable. Breathe. Breathe.